Savvy Single MOM-MOM Travels: Traveling Shift from Parent to Grandparent
This may be the most real blog I’ve written yet.
Just a mom who loves traveling who had two grand babies now....,
Developing a travel style that works
underlined text links to page for your convenience
The progression from regular mom- to mom who does road trips- to mom who loves to travel, on to single mom making those budget trips happen-, and into the mom/ mom mom I've become, has been gaining momentum a long time! It’s been a fun journey for me as a woman to evolve through phases of being a mom and growing into the mom I loved being. Nothing prepared me however for the shift from traveling mom to traveling grandma, or "Mom Mom" as I'm known, Here I am taking a moment to digest how that impacts our life and travel style.
There's Questions on this journey: We've been so many places, and now we have to ask ourselves if we keep planning those bigger, farther places (next up on our wish list is the Pacific Northwest) how do we include these smaller people who we love who need to start at the beginning? It took us years of practice to develop our system for traveling well together. Babies can't keep up. Toddlers wouldn't enjoy this speed. But we love it. We also LOVE the babies and see that they are 100% part of the family and fit right in with the activities and vibe.
The short answer is: We need to balance our own bucket list trips with our local favorites and build the capacity of our little ones into travelers before dragging them along on some of our bigger badder excursions. But by starting now we hope to get their momentum quickly.
If you have recently added a new generation to your family, this may help you to develop a perspective for how to build your next steps as a family.
We've come a long way baby!
One of my absolute favorite things to do as a young mom of two was to jump on the LIRR and take the kids into the city for a day. NYC was very easy to navigate for me and I made a lot of fun memories there with my oldest two when they were still riding in the stroller! Memories they do not recall the way I do, but foundational moments that helped me to gain momentum as a mom who could take my kids and go. My family grew to four children. We moved from NY to living in Florida and most of our trips were back and forth from NY to Florida, driving up and down I95. We had the Honda Odyssey minivan loaded with a portable fridge and portapotty. We rocked with the built in DVD players which definitely made the car ride better! We later upgraded to bringing video games on long car rides, we kept creative in our travel hacks! All this previous to cell phones which now I find myself threatening to take away from grown people in my vehicle. Lol.
As I got a little more comfortable and the kids got bigger, we did a trip out to California to visit cousins in San Fransisco. This was our first plane ride excursion. It was a success, and we discovered something awesome, that we loved it! I’d made good plans, convinced the cousins to road trip the West Coast with us and the adventure was awesome!
My kids and I have since made several awesome adventures which cover all four corners of the country. We are blessed with some great memories from exploring and discovering history, art, and cultures all over the US. I keep coming back to the idea that you get 18 summer vacations with your kids and if you plan them properly you can teach them ALL the most important things that build a strong foundation for who they will be once they leave the nest. Here's more on how we plan budget friendly family travel.
Getting Promoted to Grandmom who travels
Fast forward… The first grand baby was my fast best friend. Two beautiful granddaughters now make the world a brighter place. As a grandma (aka Mom Mom), I am thrilled to start over. Return to some of our favorite places, and make trips get to be reexperienced through new eyes! Start small again. We are excited just by the neighborhood park and splash pad. The Zoo might as well be a national treasure, and since we live in Florida, Disney and the theme parks are a rite of passage before turning 3 and the price tag applies to your child. One of my most popular blogs is Orlando, Besides the Theme Parks.
Educationally...
I am excited to start small and grow with them, teaching them how to make hands on connections with the world we live in. So much research links travel to building self-esteem, appreciation of culture and nature, and having a higher vocabulary with more verbal skills. Yes, the educator in my LOVES teaching through hands on learning opportunities and just exposing children to more places creates context in their own minds.
Educationally, the other way I connect traveling with family and intentionally teaching, is differentiation. This is a common word for educators, but for families what it means is what works for one doesn't necessarily work for all, but we all get what we need. That means I may need to be flexible with my travel style and plans to keep the whole group engaged and happy. Now no where do I ever subscribe to the idea that it's my job to make everyone happy. However, I do believe by removing barriers happiness will automatically occur. I do try to provide opportunities to learn new cultures, try new foods, and access information not typically available to use where we live.
But it’s human nature to do things a little differently with a grandchild, as opposed to your own children. My kids have noticed, and fortunately, they embrace these things knowing we've done good. I find myself noting the differences in my own self at this junction.
Strategies that work
One huge difference in how I grandparent as opposed to parenting = Strategy #1. High Quality.
I am not a retired grandma with time to crochet blankets and keep the babies all day. I am still working, still budgeting, and still loving to grab and go (A grandma bag is an essential to being ready). But now I really focus on quality over quantity in all we do. I don't have to meet all this child's needs, she has parents. These babies get from me the extras, the icing on the top. I need to be ready when my daughter makes an offer to hang out. If they are coming over, this might mean we will be playing with playdough or doing some artwork. My grandbaby especially loves the pool too. More often than not I am going to try to create an experience home or away that sets us up for some quality time. This means prioritizing the time together over other things that can wait.
I can’t have every day and every time together, so I really prioritize to ensure the time we share is a high-quality experience. If every time they visited, I was preoccupied I would not be able to make this happen. Realistically I know there is still laundry and chores, so I also believe in getting the kids to help by making it a fun part of the routine! Get the "Stuff" done and enjoy time more intentionally.
High Quality is not just in time, it's the things I'd never have thought to do for my own children. I'm buying the cotton organic bamboo pajamas and all of the sensory items to help with self-regulation. My daughter even comments sometimes "who are you?" It's fun to be a grandma. Maybe because they still go home, and the role is different. Maybe because I've learned what works and doesn't and I'm willing. Also, these kids don't scare me!
High Quality regularly is lived in a variety of ways. Realistically, we don't go somewhere exciting every weekend, sometimes we just stay home. Having a sleep over at Grandmas (aka Mom Mom’s house? a new set of pajamas and dance party sound fun. The girls each have a set of things at Mom Moms, and I am organized with my little supplies looking forward to being ready for their visits.
Headed up to the local park/ playground? I am packing the things I might have forgotten as a mom. My mom mom bag is ready with napkins, extra plastic ware, the beach sheet (for picnics or splash pads) and other items that go beyond the typical change of clothes and baby wipes essentials. I refill this bag prior to going anywhere just keeping it ready as part of my own mindset.
Speaking of high quality, and being organized: My Mom Mom Bag and favorite items come from Parker Baby Co. This my favorite new place for all things baby related. Being more intentional in how I want to live is part of this journey. Having my own diaper bag backpack is essential for staying organized. At home, these items make bath time better and keep me ready. These beautifully cotton woven rope baskets are incredible for keeping the girls' items, and the diaper caddy keeps it all at hand. This makes it simpler for me to manage our time. Time is the hottest commodity!
In other words, Mom Mom’s job is not to do the basics, but to make the magic happen. As a parent I was always trying to bridge that gap, often at my own expense. Now as a Mom Mom, I have time between visits to recharge and imagine how I want the event to look, making more of the details ready before hand. Which brings me to number 2.
Strategy #2. Details.
As a mom, the event was the event. As a mom mom, the event is a lot of smaller details worked out to create a really special occasion. The occasion may be a walk around the block in the rain or swimming in the pool, but because I have some time between my girls coming over, I was able to set the space how it would be easiest for us to enjoy the most. As a parent, my time and energy were so limited this was HARD. My space was always a reflection of our business – now it can vary between the moment and the vision as needed.
How this looks traveling means I am willing to allow the bigger crew some quality time together as siblings while I am happy to have the littlest one snuggled close to me for some extra time together. This may be while they nap in the stroller, and I sit down (something never imaginable as a parent) and might mean I float with the baby around the lazy river 17 times while they all hit the water slides. In any event, my heart is happy because we are all together.
Strategy #3. Routines.
Boooo, Routines are boring! As a mom yes, as a grandma, no.
Something else I’ve learned is beauty in the small things. If I can give my daughter a few moments to herself and give the girls a little fun in their routine I am winning. I have found bathtime is a specialty for me since I love the water play aspect anyway. Probably because I remember sitting in my own grandmothers oversized clawed bathtub and playing with empty bottles as I measured and poured containers and swirled washcloths till I turned into a raisin. Now, I try to create a bath time for my girls, which as a parent can be a chore but as a grandparent can be a lot more fun. This may mean some bath toys, or just measuring cups and fun songs, but either way I’ve made this a time that the girls can be a memory for them.
~~ So far all of these details are not specific to travel~~
Because the reality is good traveling starts at home with these three things first: High Quality, Details and Routines. These three things established roll into all of our other things we do!
Hands free is better, and less things being carried saves energy for baby!
How many times are our hands full? Bag over shoulder, backpack hanging off and you're carrying a baby? Make life easier wherever possible.
What makes the birch diaper bag backpack a good one?
The features! Two insulated side pouches are perfect for keeping items cold (including water bottles) and there's a slim pocket for keeping your cell phone or wallet well placed. I want everything to have a place, and this one bag makes it easy to keep track of it all. Not to mention it comes with a padded lap top sleeve, as if they knew I may need to do some work while I am multi-tasking in life! See yours here.
Now: Traveling….
My job involves work travel. Recently, I was assigned to a conference in Orlando which is about 80 miles from home. I invited my kids to come over and enjoy the Hotel while I was working and much to my surprise (they literally snuck up on me after saying they weren’t coming) they came and enjoyed themselves. This gave my mom and grandma heart SO MUCH JOY! My coworkers were able to meet my family, and they all had a little afternoon siesta by the pool. Now, my grandbaby Nasali who just turned three thinks Mom Mom works at a pool! Ha!! I told Nasali as she took a bath in the tun in the middle of my hotel room she was on vacation while I was working, and she said “what’s a vacation?”. A child after my own heart for sure. One of my wonderful coworkers shared a Build-A-Bear experience with Nasali that the Hotel had offered as a fun activity. This was so special! If you are traveling to Orlando and want an affordable but great stay, check out Cypress Pointe Orlando - it's a Hilton Vacation Club.
Her one-month-old sister also came along on this trip to Orlando although she napped through pool time, mini golf, and our pizza party lunch. It’s ok to vacation how you need to!
Nasali has dropped me off at the airport for work trips a few times and always asks if she can come with me to which I always say, “we are going to travel together and do great things” and also, “one of these travels you and mommy will come to”. Some of the trips we’ve taken already include: A road trip to Key West, Pensacola, Flying to NY for a family function, and a lot of local Florida trips. We have more planned.
When traveling I always keep items on hand that may save me time and money later. I bring my electric kettle, with a variety of items hot water can make like some oatmeal, hot cocoa, or tea!!
I say all of this to say, seize the moment. Live with passion for making it happen how you can. The stars may not align, and nothing goes perfectly, but take the moments where you can. If it’s 2 hours together? Great, find those close places for a picnic or a local experience. Create favorite places together for those short windows of time. If you have a whole day, draw a circle as to all the places with in a 90-minute driving window that are in your comfort zone and begin to expand that circle as time allows.
Our #4 Strategy here is TIME.
Time is our most precious limited resource. How we use it is crucial to who we are and the relationships we share. In a world where there’s no need to work and plan for quality time, this may be easier. In my reality, my time is valuable, and the things don’t just happen on their own. Let me emphasize, time and energy are BOTH the most important gifts we have and share. How we plan to use these makes or breaks our experiences directly.
How do we manage time? Keep a calendar. Keep a bucket list. Keep a dry erase for intentional use of smaller and easier activities.
PLAN for your challenges. What are your challenges? Identify them. Then plan how you will manage those challenges. Anything can be possible!
Be Intentional with your scheduling and keep your agreements – if you set a time (short of illness) keep it! Be flexible, stay positive and roll with the flow, cause the good Lord knows that all the things that happen make it harder to get out of the house and hold up the adventure. BUT – Where there is a will there is a way. Sometimes the days that are the most work to get on with, are the days that end up being the best days ever. How many times I was just exhausted before I ever left my house but still kept the plans making the most incredible memories.
Experience.
I've already done a lot of these things once, with my own 4 children. As a teacher in Early Childhood, I've practiced with children of all ages, sizes and abilities. Now I am focusing on the things I wished I had MORE focused on with my own children. The little child stage which in the parenting timeline feels permanent and hard. It passes so quickly. Now I am reliving my own children in these little ones and loving being present in the moment so much more.
HOME
In a world where I travel more for work, home has become more of a place of refuge. When I am at home, I need a system that allows me to enjoy being in my space as my time there is also limited. Home is an experience as well! As a grandma, home is the place these babies will always have to return and build their own foundation. They have their own things here and I love that this house is bigger than just me.
Baby's first baths in the kitchen sink. We love these muslin burp cloths to line the sink and create a softer surface. Later we pulled out our favorite, the bath flower to really make the kitchen sink feel more comfortable. Baby LOVES bath time. We also found muslin cotton baby washcloths at Parker Baby Co, along with the hooded towel. Now I've always been a f an of a hooded bath towel, but I've never had a towel this thick and luxurious before. Wrapping up the baby was delightful.
I love bath time, and I love baby bath time! This soft, thick cotton hooded bath towel is amazing. I can't express how much I wish I'd found this company sooner because I am giving these for all the baby gifts now! Get yours here.
Tips for Making Grandparenting Easier:
Have your own set of must have items for making life easier.
This may include:
*Car seat
*Stroller
*Diaper Bag
*Bouncy Chair
*Swing
*Diapers/ Wipes
*Clothes
*Toys
*Organization System (dresser or baskets depending on your set up)
*Things they use which may include soaps, laundry detergent, creams, lotions...
Yes, I know it adds up, but once you have these items it makes life smoother and easier!
I'll add some links to my favorite items below to make life easier for those who are in the process of finding a system that works:
As a grandma some of my other favorites include learning toys for home:
*Water table
*Magnet tiles
*light up cubes
*Books we read
*I make photo books of some of our adventures to talk about them later and document our fun.
All in all this is a journey, not a destination. Time is a funny thing, sometimes it feels like it's moving so slowly and other times it races by. Lately there's been a lot of racing! Slow down and enjoy the process and don't forget to take those deep breaths.
Wherever your travels take you, I hope you are healthy and enjoy every step of the journey!
Stay positively blessed and thank you for visiting, I appreciate you!
Thank you,
Savvy Single Mama
I appreciate you stopping by today, please subscribe and share so we can stay connected.
I specialize in helping families spend more time enjoying their quality time together and less time having to figure it all out. My four children have been my test subjects of how to plan a great family adventure for many years and now that my youngest is 18, many of my travels are work related, or grandma related! As time has changed, I've evolved but I still LOVE TO TRAVEL, explore, wander, visit, discover, learn and love. If nature is there, I can find my happy place. I use the term single not to emphasize my status but to signify that if I can manage some family fun on a limited teacher's salary with four children, anyone can do it. I am just very intentional in how I spend my time and earnings. I typically seek out budget friendly ways to enjoy my time, but will occasionally splurge for the right reasons :-)
My goal is to make traveling easier for families and cut down on the planning process. 💜
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